GoNuclear
20th January 2012, 10:38 PM
It just hit me. I was pondering what the hold is that DM and the Cof$ has over Tom Cruise, and then the simplicity of it struck me ... TC is a mooch, plain and simple. Now what do I mean by a mooch?
Way back when, as in the early 80's, I went from gig to gig working various WATS line operations. WATS = Wide Area Telephone Service. Back then, some of you may remember, phone calls outside of your own area code were expensive, but, you can reach a lot more people by phone than by knocking on doors. Hence the WATS line operation. The operator would be given a break on per call charges, because they were making tens of thousands of long distance calls monthly. A high volume WATS line operation could easily have a $50,000 to $100,000 or more phone bill on a monthly basis, no shit. In fact, that was their greatest cost of doing business. All of the guys working the phones were on straight commission ... there was absolutely no such thing as salary or draw or salary plus. If a newbie came in, he was given a pitch sheet, a desk with a phone, and a stack of lead cards to call. If he didn't have orders by the end of a week he was gone, plain and simple.
There were different types of phone rooms with different products, different dress codes, different commission structures, different caliber of people, etc, etc, etc. On the high end were brokerages pitching gold and silver coin contracts, investment gem stones, strategic metals, oil and gas leasing limited partnerships, etc. These required a higher caliber of salesman. Newbies would tend to die like flies, but, there were 10k per week commission hustlers, which back in 1981 was really good money.
There were the low end phone rooms with the least professional salesmen doing promo deals. The high end of the high end was about 1200 bux per week. If you got someone off the street who wasn't lame or totally braindead ... i.e., could read off a pitch sheet, always sound upbeat, not stutter, and could think on his feet, you could have him making 500 bux per week after a week or two. Still not bad for back then considering skill level. These rooms were often the most fun to work, with balloons to pop after each order to see what the bonus was, which was usually a 1 or 2 dollar cash spiff. Generally a younger group of salespeople.
Then there were the in between rooms ... mid range ... selling various things like plumbing supplies, machine tools, truck tarps, etc. And there was one particular selling game that fit into this mid range, and that was OFFICE SUPPLIES. The thing about office supplies that was different than the other selling gigs ... the rooms were smaller, usually run by the Hungarians, they wouldn't hesitate to rip off the phone companies any way they possibly could, or anybody else for that matter. They cut corners. In fact, they were phuggen crooks short of sticking guns in people's faces, but always looking for a new scam. The good thing about these ops ... you kept your own book. Every other phone room you either fronted or loaded. If you were fronting, you were opening accounts, doing all the cold calling, but some pro in the back room was working the guy you opened and loading him and making the big money. In any other room, every frontman was a wannabe loader. In office supplies, you kept your own book, meaning if you were strong enough to eek out a living opening new accounts for 4 or 5 months, the game would get sweeter and sweeter as a larger and larger percentage of your business would be from accounts that you loaded and re-loaded. A good office supply guy who knew and understood what the game was and what the limit was of what you could get away with, would, after about a year ... first year in the biz was the toughest ... be taking down 1500 per week and it would be a fairly laid back gig. There were pros that did double that, but an average pro who was slightly lazy or liked doing other things like playing poker would be doing 1200 to 1800 per week.
"Ok, ok, Pete, get to the phuggen point already!!!" Don't worry, I'm there, and will tie it back to TC ... the question was how to sell office supplies on the phone at higher than retail costs when they could get the same thing down the block at some office supply house for less money. The answer: (drum roll here) BECAUSE THEY WERE MOOCHES FOR PREMIUMS!!!!!! The name of the game for the salesman is to FIND AND CULTIVATE MOOCHES, at least in the office supply biz. The opener call didn't involve that so much, but, an initial order at least qualified the buyer as stupid enough to pay more than he or she had to over the phone. But how to load the account ... IT CAME DOWN TO BRIBING THE BUYER.
The premiums would start small but get larger. Various knick knaks like you might get if you smoked like a chimney and saved your Marlboro Miles. It would start with cheap cameras, graduate to gym bags, better luggage sets, various pieces of furniture, portable boom boxes and TV sets, etc. Finally, when you had your mooch trained to accept being invoiced twice for the same order, accepting orders that were short shipped ... that is, only half of what was ordered, double invoiced, then the balance of the order, again double invoiced ... in otherwords, paying 4 times for the order ... that is when you would start offering cash bribes or sometimes an oz of weed or a few grams of toot. USUALLY, the buyer had no stake in what was being ordered, as they were spending company money. Once in awhile you could fish in the honcho of a company, and there they would be hooked on getting a suprise with the order. That was the hook ... THEY WERE MOOCHES FOR THE SUPRISE.
THAT BRINGS IT BACK TO TC ... I believe he is a mooch for being suprised. Just like the office supply game ... there was a "real reason" ... i.e., you needed the office supplies ... with TC the "real reason" is he is "helping to clear the planet" ... he can always hang his hat on that ... but he is, at heart, a mooch that DM cultivated. Just like when you send in 100 bux for some TV evangelist you get something from his premium catalog ... just like the mooch who allows himself to be sold office supplies on the phone ... TC is hooked on the premiums, the suprises. The money is not much of an object, not when you are worth half a billion or at least close to that if not more. The thrill is to have the leader of your religion, your pope, give you a premium that can't be had elsewhere. For instance, the TC bike done with Sea Org labor. Same with that van with the burl countertop and other burl trim. Or that presentation for valor in 2004 where he had his ego stroked in front of that crowd. Or a b'day bash on the AsbestosWhiff aka The Breakwinds. Or even some puddypie ... after all, guess who hooked him up with Katie, and followed them around on their honeymoon to make sure his needle was hard, er, oops, I mean floating?
Tommy is being played, we all know that. The how is that he is hooked on premiums. The difference between him and your ordinary Marlboro Miles catalog mooch is just the size and value of the premium.
But here is a clue for stinkerette smokers ... it would be far cheaper to just buy the damn premium than to smoke all of those packs of stinkerettes to get them. And here is a clue for TC ... just buy your own toys, that is cheaper than donating to the Cof$/IAS. But it is more than that ... it's collecting all those silly coupons or having your pope pat you on the back. Now THAT is being moochified.
Pete
Way back when, as in the early 80's, I went from gig to gig working various WATS line operations. WATS = Wide Area Telephone Service. Back then, some of you may remember, phone calls outside of your own area code were expensive, but, you can reach a lot more people by phone than by knocking on doors. Hence the WATS line operation. The operator would be given a break on per call charges, because they were making tens of thousands of long distance calls monthly. A high volume WATS line operation could easily have a $50,000 to $100,000 or more phone bill on a monthly basis, no shit. In fact, that was their greatest cost of doing business. All of the guys working the phones were on straight commission ... there was absolutely no such thing as salary or draw or salary plus. If a newbie came in, he was given a pitch sheet, a desk with a phone, and a stack of lead cards to call. If he didn't have orders by the end of a week he was gone, plain and simple.
There were different types of phone rooms with different products, different dress codes, different commission structures, different caliber of people, etc, etc, etc. On the high end were brokerages pitching gold and silver coin contracts, investment gem stones, strategic metals, oil and gas leasing limited partnerships, etc. These required a higher caliber of salesman. Newbies would tend to die like flies, but, there were 10k per week commission hustlers, which back in 1981 was really good money.
There were the low end phone rooms with the least professional salesmen doing promo deals. The high end of the high end was about 1200 bux per week. If you got someone off the street who wasn't lame or totally braindead ... i.e., could read off a pitch sheet, always sound upbeat, not stutter, and could think on his feet, you could have him making 500 bux per week after a week or two. Still not bad for back then considering skill level. These rooms were often the most fun to work, with balloons to pop after each order to see what the bonus was, which was usually a 1 or 2 dollar cash spiff. Generally a younger group of salespeople.
Then there were the in between rooms ... mid range ... selling various things like plumbing supplies, machine tools, truck tarps, etc. And there was one particular selling game that fit into this mid range, and that was OFFICE SUPPLIES. The thing about office supplies that was different than the other selling gigs ... the rooms were smaller, usually run by the Hungarians, they wouldn't hesitate to rip off the phone companies any way they possibly could, or anybody else for that matter. They cut corners. In fact, they were phuggen crooks short of sticking guns in people's faces, but always looking for a new scam. The good thing about these ops ... you kept your own book. Every other phone room you either fronted or loaded. If you were fronting, you were opening accounts, doing all the cold calling, but some pro in the back room was working the guy you opened and loading him and making the big money. In any other room, every frontman was a wannabe loader. In office supplies, you kept your own book, meaning if you were strong enough to eek out a living opening new accounts for 4 or 5 months, the game would get sweeter and sweeter as a larger and larger percentage of your business would be from accounts that you loaded and re-loaded. A good office supply guy who knew and understood what the game was and what the limit was of what you could get away with, would, after about a year ... first year in the biz was the toughest ... be taking down 1500 per week and it would be a fairly laid back gig. There were pros that did double that, but an average pro who was slightly lazy or liked doing other things like playing poker would be doing 1200 to 1800 per week.
"Ok, ok, Pete, get to the phuggen point already!!!" Don't worry, I'm there, and will tie it back to TC ... the question was how to sell office supplies on the phone at higher than retail costs when they could get the same thing down the block at some office supply house for less money. The answer: (drum roll here) BECAUSE THEY WERE MOOCHES FOR PREMIUMS!!!!!! The name of the game for the salesman is to FIND AND CULTIVATE MOOCHES, at least in the office supply biz. The opener call didn't involve that so much, but, an initial order at least qualified the buyer as stupid enough to pay more than he or she had to over the phone. But how to load the account ... IT CAME DOWN TO BRIBING THE BUYER.
The premiums would start small but get larger. Various knick knaks like you might get if you smoked like a chimney and saved your Marlboro Miles. It would start with cheap cameras, graduate to gym bags, better luggage sets, various pieces of furniture, portable boom boxes and TV sets, etc. Finally, when you had your mooch trained to accept being invoiced twice for the same order, accepting orders that were short shipped ... that is, only half of what was ordered, double invoiced, then the balance of the order, again double invoiced ... in otherwords, paying 4 times for the order ... that is when you would start offering cash bribes or sometimes an oz of weed or a few grams of toot. USUALLY, the buyer had no stake in what was being ordered, as they were spending company money. Once in awhile you could fish in the honcho of a company, and there they would be hooked on getting a suprise with the order. That was the hook ... THEY WERE MOOCHES FOR THE SUPRISE.
THAT BRINGS IT BACK TO TC ... I believe he is a mooch for being suprised. Just like the office supply game ... there was a "real reason" ... i.e., you needed the office supplies ... with TC the "real reason" is he is "helping to clear the planet" ... he can always hang his hat on that ... but he is, at heart, a mooch that DM cultivated. Just like when you send in 100 bux for some TV evangelist you get something from his premium catalog ... just like the mooch who allows himself to be sold office supplies on the phone ... TC is hooked on the premiums, the suprises. The money is not much of an object, not when you are worth half a billion or at least close to that if not more. The thrill is to have the leader of your religion, your pope, give you a premium that can't be had elsewhere. For instance, the TC bike done with Sea Org labor. Same with that van with the burl countertop and other burl trim. Or that presentation for valor in 2004 where he had his ego stroked in front of that crowd. Or a b'day bash on the AsbestosWhiff aka The Breakwinds. Or even some puddypie ... after all, guess who hooked him up with Katie, and followed them around on their honeymoon to make sure his needle was hard, er, oops, I mean floating?
Tommy is being played, we all know that. The how is that he is hooked on premiums. The difference between him and your ordinary Marlboro Miles catalog mooch is just the size and value of the premium.
But here is a clue for stinkerette smokers ... it would be far cheaper to just buy the damn premium than to smoke all of those packs of stinkerettes to get them. And here is a clue for TC ... just buy your own toys, that is cheaper than donating to the Cof$/IAS. But it is more than that ... it's collecting all those silly coupons or having your pope pat you on the back. Now THAT is being moochified.
Pete