To me it is total waste to focus on any self, or identity, including the identity, L. Ron Hubbard. It is a total waste to try to figure the intention of any identity.
The only profitable activity is to focus on inconsistencies and blow them apart.
Here is the inconsistency about the most basic activity in Scientology, TR0.
I describe the basic TRs (Training Routines) of Scientology briefly in my entries of Chapter 4 and Chapter 5. Let me go over how I look at them today.
I find that my perception of TR0 has always been different from most other scientologists because of my eastern background. In Scientology, the whole purpose of TRs is to train a person to audit. So, the purpose of TR0, in Scientology, is to make a person confront another person without reacting. TR0 encourages a person to develop a personality that is pleasant but firm and totally under its own control. It is like assuming the role of an auditor and be totally absorbed in it. It is what good actors do.
I didn’t know it, but I did TR0 totally differently. I approached it the way Buddha taught Vipassana meditation. I didn’t resist and simply experienced fully whatever came up during straight TR0 and TR0 bullbait. I have documented this approach in KHTK 1: INTRODUCTION TO LOOKING. Basically, I laid myself fully open to myself. It was like cleaning any behavior patterns that I may have unwittingly assumed in the past. It was opposite from developing any auditor persona.
I thought that I was doing what I was supposed to do on TR0. I found it to be very therapeutic. But, what I was doing was later termed as a “squirrel” practice by official Scientology. “Squirrel” is a derogatory term used in Scientology for those who alter standard Scientology practice.
Today, I do not subscribe to Dianetics and Scientology. I find their approach in TR0 as part of a subtle conditioning. I prefer the approach I naturally took, which actually was taught by Buddha 2600 years ago.
I find that Scientology approach actually leads to conditioning, Whereas, the eastern approach of “looking at what is there and spotting inconsistencies,” leads to mental and spiritual liberation.