"Scientology, well understood, is a very powerful thing. Poorly relayed, poorly communicated, monopolized or used exclusively for gain, it could be a very destructive thing." - LRH June 1955
+ He told me he was obsessed by "an insatiable lust for power and money". - circa 1980 Mayo on LRH =
Sorry I'm just not as on top of this thread as most others seem to be. Had a lot of work to do so please forgive my 'com lag.' Thanks for your response. Just to compare notes:
I had plenty of realizations and insights, happy states in auditing sessions. I have a lot of these now all by myself. I never had a lasting state of greater ability though through any auditing process to the best of my recollection. NEVER. Scout's honor.
I changed in many ways while I was a scientologist, but we change anyway. I did become a better listener as long as what I was listening to wasn't taboo. I became more mature I guess, more forceful, and finally more skeptical and intellectually challenging. (Then I left.) But don't these things happen anyway?
I would like to think the auditing I did helped people as well, but I think their gains were fleeting. like mine. Of course I can't know that, but that's what I assume based on an honest assessment of my own experience and a great deal of testimony from others. Still, I think there's great value in being an attentive and supportive listener. This is something I did practice in the cult and something I've decided to use more. But is this scientology? It certainly pre-dates scn and it doesn't really characterize scn--continuous control, and a sort of 'molding' by training and covert and overt indication of what's wrong with you do. There are or at least were (for me) pockets of understanding in sessions and elsewhere in a general sea of control and labeling.
I didn't do KTL, but I was 'superliterate,' having cleared every word on the student hat and then restudied it. I felt great for a while. Then faded. But I had been looking up words I didn't know since my mid teens. I still do, and I think it's important. That's why we have dictionaries I guess. Wherever learned, looking up words is a great idea.
I never honestly got the 'life is a game' stuff. To me it isn't. It's definitely inexplicable and wondrous when not awful, but I think it's more than a game.
Fixed ideas and the 'data series' were things I was heavily into during part of my s.o. career. The materials seem ambiguous and vague to me now. Like a surrogate for something that was necessarily missing in scn: the use of evidence, rigorous testing, peer review, open discussion, and unfettered imagination. Hubbard's imagination was evident all over the place, but I think ours was fettered, tamed and directed.
Cycles of action was something I used and I still break things down in that way, but I don't attribute it to scn. I just think, 'If I don't do it, it ain't gettin done.' There's a fair amount of evidence that people have been pretty good at getting thing done too--the space shuttle, jet liners, etc. (Kidding, not insulting)
I still try to be cause over conditions too. Quit smoking last year after 2,354 tries.
Thanks JohnD I have had a couple things change in session permanently, but what is interesting about them, they have become normal op. So I don't notice them as being different any more. I have also had the fade but, whatever.
I am happy with the gains I got - I don't feel bad about having done the bridge, however I wish I was more frugal with my money. I pissed too much away, but I thought I was doing the right thing. If Scientology wasn't so F'ed up, I'd be happy to finish my 7 and do the l's etc. and get whatever I could from them. But now, I am disillusioned and am on the fence about finishing 7 in the field (not at Marty's Casa De Mentiras either BTW.)(house of lies)
It's hard to know, Dil. Even James Holmes did nice things for people sometimes. Nobody is all good or all evil. But if I was choosing a model to emulate for spirituality then Mother Teresa or St Francis of Assisi might be more up my alley. Ghandi maybe. Someone like that. Hell, even Kwai Chang Caine from the Kung Fu show on telly. Purple Rain
Purple Rain ~ I kind of see it like this: Say LRH was a pretty much typical intelligent person, with lots of goals to be famous or successful, with a modest amount of overts here or there.. and suddenly found something buried in his backyard worth 100 Trillion Dollars.. what would he do with it? Maybe his intentions at first would be somewhat honorable, but over time, with so much Buying, Bribing, Taking over others businesses, other people's envy and attacks,etc, it might cause his intentions to change for the worst.. that's kind of what I'm thinking.. I agree - nobody is all good or evil.. however, sometimes the evil side will do so much damage that you wonder where the good side went.. Whatever he originally had in mind, it seems he ended up doing much more damage than good in terms of Scientologists achieving what he promised, and in terms of the money ratio.. somehow most of us went broke, while he got quite wealthy.. which I believe is still going on today in the church, in an even more lopsided way.. DM more rich.. staff and PC's, more poor with even Less Gains. Dilpickle
Obviously, IANAL but I do know the fundamental difference between Criminal and Civil Law. As a matter of fact, I have experienced being a participant in all four “Civilian ‘faces’” (pun intended) of Civil Law…Juror, Witness, Plaintiff and Defendant.
Now, El Ron had folks that sure enough wanted to serve Hisself and get the ball rolling and that ball means discovery, depositions, testimony, etc. and the “Powers That Be”, once you are served, sure enough keep that ball rolling and, in fact, are the impetus and validation for the document of process itself being served which starts the ball rolling in the first place.
The fact is that El Ron at that stage of life was no longer ready for Prime Time. He had bouts of Paranoia, fits of anger and rage and would have been in, IMO, great peril of being rendered a snarling, babbling near fool under cross examination during deposition and trial. El Ron was AFRAID and Hisself’s “Inner Circle” was equally afraid of how Hisself would perform on “Stage” in the “Real World” Extemporaneously and Solo, and of what El Ron would do to them if they ever "allowed" that to happen.
Unindicted co-conspirators ain’t nothin’ new, unique to Hisself or something to be proud about…It’s pretty much a good indication of just how slick a Con you were and effective at setting up others to take the fall and throwing them under the bus.
Last edited by afaceinthecrowd; 31st July 2012 at 06:22 PM.
Living is a Metaphor of Life
I also shoulda included that, IMO, if the latter years El Ron had ever been cross examined in a Court of Law proceeding Hisself may also have just simply collapsed in shear terror.
My main point was that Hisself's behavior at that stage was unpredictable, transient and at times quite unnerving. It took great deftness, real skill and and sometimes just simple pure luck to survive for a length of time in El Ron's "Inner Circle".
Last edited by afaceinthecrowd; 31st July 2012 at 06:53 PM.
Living is a Metaphor of Life
The FIRST thing I learned in Scn. is that it is made up of ONLY the MOST important datums!
It was not a SEA of facts where one fact is just as important as another fact but Scn. only works with the MOST IMPORTANT.
Then when I got further into it I found the MOST important is .. Misunderstood words, Overts, reactive mind, beingness, missed withholds, implants, engrames, ethics, SP's, Psychs, ARC, ARCX, communication, ALL of Hubbard's PL's and ALL HCOB's, etc, etc.
Scn. just another sea of facts where one fact is just as important as another.
And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free. Jesus.
My life and Scn.