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Thread: What was your 'Tipping Point'?

  1. #81

    Smile Re: What was your 'Tipping Point'?

    I quit staff in good terms with the Org and with no free-loader debt or anything of the kind. As soon as I was a "public" again I started feeling the pressure of regges and one thing that surprised me, even tech staff would call me late at night to try to extort 6000 Dollars for the IAS from me, when I was in a difficult financial situation. I was getting so many calls a day asking for money, that I just changed my phone number and moved away. One girl from CLO called me trying to sell the book "Ron the Photographer" or something of the kind, she said I could buy it and show it to my friends. I never thought L. Ron was a good photographer, He used to have the best cameras at the time, but I never saw any remarkable picture. It was perhaps the work of good amateur. I just wanted to stop all this pushy people trying to enforce things on me and I told my self I should back up, and just wait and see. Then came Coridon, Barefaced Messiah, Hawkings, Cook, Rinder, Marty and some old pals who where up to OT VI or VIII, public and staff, who had left. Since then it's been a good bridge to reasonable freedom and away from total enslavement.

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  3. #82

    Default Re: What was your 'Tipping Point'?

    I hope no one minds me resurrecting this thread. I figured I'd tell a little bit of my story since it will soon by "BPI" in my book anyway. I'm able to pinpoint some good moments -- tipping points -- that made me want to finally leave, though several about the organization always lingered, even when Hubbard was still alive. I was always a little skeptical of the way things ran.

    But anyway, I'd been in since I was 12, which is young. I was connected in a strange way and not officially "in" until 17 or 18 (on course every day and had almost all Scientology friends). I joined staff by 19 or 20 at a Narconon, and started seriously training and going up the bridge at that same time. I did not have parents in, or family, sans my older brother who initially led me in via his high profile celebrity friend that was working on bringing him in for a while. But soon after his main introduction, my brother got very heavily involved with drugs. That flipped a switched in me to get super serious about Scn and even join staff at NN. If I couldn't get him in there, I thought maybe helping others would soothe me somehow.

    Surprisingly, we did get my brother in, a few times in fact . The cycle kept repeating itself and I eventually left staff "correctly" without any sort of freeloaders debt. I replaced myself with a fully trained OES and someone to run the Purif and another to run the courseroom.

    Fast forward another fifteen years, I'd gone to Italy (almost took a job as the CS at a small mission there), but wound up at Flag, and ultimate went back home to Los Angeles and spent five years in a collaborative art project with all Scientologists until I started to have physical issues. That would turn out to be serious, but I disagreed every time I saw a new wog doctor. I only took supplements from Dr. Denk, until he recommended a neurologist too. I told no one of course what the doctors were saying. I was Clear by then and felt I had to uphold a certain kind of PR. Some of the meds that were recommended for my illness were SSRIs and I would not take them in fear I would not be able to get services, but I started to feel that maybe I didn't want services anymore anyway...

    About a year before the symptoms came front and center, I had a big blow up with the LA Org. My (then) husband wrote them a very large check right after he knew I'd written checks to all of our creditor a few days before to get us out of debt, plus a check to AO for me to get some pre-OT stuff squared away so I could just finish up my solo course, etc. At the time, he was on his Purif, and in ethics writing O/Ws. He shouldn't have been in a reg's office to begin with. Anyway, they got him to write a counter check for everything we had, I mean everything, and he told me when he came home late at high on a Wednesday. Needless to say I had a shit-fit and lost my marbles. The Reg's told him that if I reacted negatively to him when he got home that I was definitely an SP. So I lost my mind about that.

    I told them I didn't care what they said or even if they declared me, I wanted a refund cycle. I wrote it all up to RTC. I tried to stop payment in the morning but those reges had already cashed the check just minutes before I got to my branch at 9AM. I was ready to leave Scientology then, but RTC fixed it all in my favor. Still, I paid a lot of money in bank and bounced check fees. The two reges never were reprimanded either and continued to call me an SP behind my back to my husband.

    When I got sick, the CS at AO just kept telling me that I should get assists and keep them updated on my health. I saw "PTS" written in big letters inside my folder and knew I was never going back.

    A year later (by the way, I was divorced by then) I was watching a documentary about David Koresh and something about it clicked for me. I started obsessively reading about him on the internet after watching the show. More and more clicks went off in my head about his personality profile being a lot like Hubbard's. That's when I somehow found videos about Magoo. She was leaving in real time while all this was all happening (1999 or 2000). I couldn't take my eyes off of it and I didn't even know if I believe she was telling the truth as first because she worked for OSA.

    Then came the day I read Monica Pignotti's book. I got to the part where she was about to describe the moments before she was going to read the handwritten notes by Hubbard on OT3, "75 million years ago, etc." and I braced myself for what was about to come next. I knew I wasn't supposed to read the next lines, or even that one, though, I heard that OT3 was based on an incident that happened around that time. I was scared to read further, so I just kind of skimmed the next few sentences and wondered if I skimmed it correctly.


    Wait, what?

    Was I reading that right? I had to read it very close and sure as shit that's what it said.

    That's when everything, and I mean everything, came CRASHING DOWN on me.

    It's not easy, when you think you were a half way intelligent human being, and be duped liked that. That is what I would have been putting my life's savings into? And still, many parts of me worried about whether or not he was right. How ridiculous is that?

    And then from there, it's been a very long recovery, believe it or not.

    What got me into the cult to begin with is ugly too. Lots of abuse of astronomical proportions. In fact, in many ways, Scientology helped to get me out of that situation. So it's strange indeed.
    Last edited by EZ Linus; 21st April 2017 at 10:51 PM. Reason: bunch of typos

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  5. #83
    Patron with Honors hummingbird's Avatar
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    Oct 2009

    Default Re: What was your 'Tipping Point'?

    Thanks for sharing your story, EZ Linus. It had quite an impact on me. What a journey you've had.

    Yes, recovery does take a long time indeed. All the best to you on your journey.

    But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself.
    -Friedrich Nietzsche

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