I meant that I had a lot in common with with Shirley Mason aka Sybil, not Schreiber (I got confused there), but that was before I knew it was a phony sensation. And I still need to read more of the links you provided, I've just been busy working -- trying to beat the clock -- to get my manuscript cleaned up before Monday morning for an agency that requested it, which is good and hopeful news. My upcoming book is not entirely about Scientology, but I'd say at least half of it is, as it is weaved throughout a 20-year span. For that reason alone, I believe it will find a publisher. There's been a lot of interest.
Anyway, I am most interested now in the DID spectrum and how it correlates with the bipolar chemical hand-me-down of my mother. Plus, the complex-PTSD and how it is "impossible" to have all these things in play at the same time, when as far as I knew, I certainly did/do had all three. I need to at least read up on that a bit before Monday because I talk an awful lot about my bipolar (and disassociative) behaviors in retrospect as I lived my life in Scientology and within Scientology subgroups, staff, relationships, social groups, etc. in my book. It all makes perfect sense to me, especially the schizo-effective aspect of my bipolar disorder, and the complete spacing out I did when in auditing sessions, or in handling things in ethics that pertained to very traumatic events that happened previous to my involvement to the cult -- like the idea of having to take responsibility for "being there" or recalling earlier similars. All that was disassociated from me just to cope with it.
There's also been a way my therapist (Ph.D), not my psychiatrist, has been treating me in regards to the whole DDNOS thing. She doesn't look at these "parts" as split personalities that are unaware of each other, they are just all me, parts of me, just as there are insecure aspects of people and confident aspects too. "Hats," like Sheila said. It's as simple as that. I am not being treated as if I have MPD.
My therapist and my psychiatrist are having a phone meeting tomorrow and I am very curious as to how this all is going to go! I really wonder if they are going to battle out the diagnoses.
It's taken me a really long time to get where I am, and maybe I'm still a long way from happily ever after, but I know I make way better choices now. Now there's better people in my life (healthier, saner, etc.), I have a completely different world view, which in turn gives me a different personality in many ways (because I believe there definitely is a cult personality), and now I live in the real world, in real reality, where there are knowns and unknowns, and I like it that way. I took me almost forever to even accept my diagnoses (my physical disability and my mental illness), obviously, because I never believed they even existed. It was a hard pill to swallow -- literally! ...Psych meds?! Are you kidding me? But I've willed everything of value in my last Will and Testament to CCHR!... Believe me, it was hard.
Blah blah blah...Back to work.