Hey-Hey, you're here! A big warm welcome to you, SM.
Well, now that you're aboard (ESMB) I need to r-factor you that you need to follow the command channel here and obey whatever orders you are given with a crisp "YES SIR!" After you are issued your uniform, you are ordered to report to Basic Training where you will learn to tie nautical knots, scrape barnacles and other vital survival skills.
If you ever try to leave ESMB without written authorization, be advised that we will immediately deploy a BlowDrill where our recovery team will stake out all the internet and social media sites and stalk you with headcams.
Scientology literally saved my life! Without Ron's books I would have frozen to death!!! (see avatar)
Scientology in one word? HelluvaHoax!
I never felt as free as when I freed myself from "Total Freedom".
For offended Scientologists reading this blasphemy about L. Ron Hubbard---my apologies for talking about real life without lying to you, like Scientology, with goo-goo theta-talk. I know you don't have a floating needle right now. You're not supposed to.