ARBY’S ANNOUNCES AGREEMENT WITH CoS TO “BOOM” ITS BUSINESS

Discussion in 'General Scientology Discussion' started by Type4_PTS, Nov 11, 2013.

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  1. Type4_PTS

    Type4_PTS Diamond Invictus SP

    John P. at the Bunker posted this Press Release a couple hours ago:
    http://tonyortega.org/2013/11/11/sc...own-six-days-to-blast-off/#comment-1118014882

     
  2. Type4_PTS

    Type4_PTS Diamond Invictus SP

    Last edited: Nov 11, 2013
  3. La La Lou Lou

    La La Lou Lou Crusader

    Re: ARBY’S ANNOUNCES AGREEMENT WITH CHURCH OF SCIENTOLOGY TO “BOOM” ITS BUSINESS

    I've never heard of Arby's and if they go to bed with the cult I don't think I ever will.
     
  4. Type4_PTS

    Type4_PTS Diamond Invictus SP

    Re: ARBY’S ANNOUNCES AGREEMENT WITH CHURCH OF SCIENTOLOGY TO “BOOM” ITS BUSINESS

    Arby's is a fast food restaurant over here in the U.S.
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arby's

    [​IMG]
     
  5. That has to be a parody, I can see it now, setting up restuarants in a business that can't afford to purchase toilet paper for it's restrooms.


    I'd like to order a medium roast beef sandwich with curly fries, but the cult took all my money, so could I trade you a few hours of auditing for it.



    Well, I'd take you up on your offer, but your cult hasn't paid it's utility bills in months and as a result the gas for our stoves has been turned off.
     
  6. La La Lou Lou

    La La Lou Lou Crusader

    Re: ARBY’S ANNOUNCES AGREEMENT WITH CHURCH OF SCIENTOLOGY TO “BOOM” ITS BUSINESS

    Perhaps I saw one in Istanbul, but it left no lasting impression so I can't remember, there would be no reason to visit a burger bar where there is wonderful fresh healthy food on every street corner. If they open up in all the UK Idle orgs they'll have to do a lot of construction then wait for the orgs to open, and that could be many many years, and the public will be too broke to eat anything but cheese sandwiches they made earlier. They'll lose a fortune.
     
  7. Techless

    Techless Patron Meritorious

    OMG - unbelievable!

    And especially since it's so healthy and all. I mean Arby's has done just the opposite of every other junk food chain in trying to be 'healthy'. Oh, wait minute: this fits perfectly with Scn operating methods!

    I suppose they'll be extending credit to all the impoverished staff...and will go belly up soon thereafter.

    Starbucks will be next....then...

    All ideal orgs will become 'Food Courts'

    yeah -
     
  8. Lurker5

    Lurker5 Gold Meritorious Patron

    Yeah, really, this has to be a joke . . . . right?

    If not, my guess, Arby's sold out to some scno - and the scno did this. STUPID. As said above, who in SO would have the money to buy a sandwich. They eat rice and beans, get paid zilch . . . Arby's is MEAT. ROAST BEEF. One meal would be a months pay. I am gonna guess, this is like a mafia deal, when the mafia goes into a bar/restaurant, takes it over, as a 'partner', silent of course, and rapes it of all profits, rips it off, until the owner goes bankrupt, or burns the business down for the insurance. Sopranos anyone? :footbullet:
     
  9. Operating DB

    Operating DB Truman Show Dropout

    Btw, this thread should be posted in the Humor section.

    Last time I ate at Arby's, like last century, I got food poisoning. I haven't eaten there since. There's even two Arby's stores within a a couple miles from where I live. I'm just glad there are no secretive scio organizations lurking in the back of those stores!
     
  10. Dulloldfart

    Dulloldfart Squirrel Extraordinaire

    It's a joke, guys. Sample quote to illustrate this:

    In the arrangement, Arby’s will increase its locations by over ten times, opening approximately 32,500 locations in the Scientology Ideal Orgs in 3,754 countries on all 53 continents. Management anticipates the creation of over 47 million jobs to support the anticipated demand from Scientologists and others.

    Paul
     
  11. cakemaker

    cakemaker Patron Meritorious

    Good grief!

    How can you think it's not a joke??? :duh:

    - “We’re always looking for ‘fresh meat’ in Scientology,
    - After pausing for a few seconds to scream at and strike several cowed underlings, Mr. Miscavige continued
    opening approximately 32,500 locations in the Scientology Ideal Orgs in 3,754 countries on all 53 continents
    - a Xenu plush toy or an action figure of Terl from ‘Battlefield Earth
    - the Church has gone from a fever dream of a hackneyed pulp science fiction writer to a major force in the world today, with over 14 billion members in 38,901 countries on all 53 continents.
     
  12. anonomog

    anonomog Gold Meritorious Patron

    You think it is a joke?
    A few transcription errors and you throw the baby out with the bathwater and think it is a joke? :duh:
    No wonder you are on a natterboard.
     
  13. Type4_PTS

    Type4_PTS Diamond Invictus SP

    Arby's can run a special: Free Roll of Toilet Paper With Each Value Meal (for IAS Members Only)
     
  14. Out-Ethics

    Out-Ethics Patron Meritorious

    You had me at roast beef! :gimmesome:

    Open the doors here comes Da Public.

    [​IMG]
     
  15. Shanester

    Shanester Patron

    Arby's! Technically, it's food

    Yes, it's a joke! Most people in America know that Arby's is a joke! Have you eaten there recently? Arby's makes the most insipid sandwiches that rival only Jack in the Box in their questionable meatiness.

    Arby's is a frequent target of Jon Stewart on the Daily Show who sometimes skewers a target (for example, the Tea Party Republicans) then pulls aside and says, "This segment was sponsored by... Arby's. Technically, it's food!"

    Tragically, the October 10, 2013 episode of the Daily Show, which had a classic example of this, is no longer available, but, at least, a description of said skewering is provided here: http://www.dailykos.com/story/2013/...ess-GOP-states-that-refuse-to-expand-Medicaid

    John P.'s post is so freakin' hilarious, I bow to his caustic genius!
    Remember! "Arby's! Technically, it's food" :roflmao:
     
  16. Techless

    Techless Patron Meritorious

    Now one can get an 'intensive' - with cheese - or intense cheese, whatever.

    really though: it's sinister plan is really: to keep everyone's metabolism 'up' for at least long enough to get through squeezing cans...

    Horsey Sauce I.V.'s anyone??

    And then, everybody notices that Arbyology cuisine produces the only genetically altered 'beef'- that shines rainbow colors (think oil-slick on top of water) when looked at from an angle...really!

    Pure Comedy
     
  17. Deeana

    Deeana Patron with Honors

    Obviously lots and lots of people must LIKE Arby's, since they have stayed in business and expanded when other chains of their type have gone out of business. And they do have other things on their menu than roast beef sandwiches. How do I know this? My youngest grandchild is a BIGTIME Arby's fan.

    John P.'s writing is good enough that you actually think it is real - for a little while. But when David Miscavige had to stop to slap an underling, that was a clue to me that it was satire.
     
  18. Shanester

    Shanester Patron

    Techless is not kidding. The iridescent quality of the meat in an Arby's sandwich would be quite pretty, really, if it weren't supposed to be -- you know -- food!

    Cheez whiz! This sounds like a bunch of horsey... sauce! And, yes, Horsey Sauce is fo' realz, yo!

    Stephen Colbert says it best! http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/370180/january-06-2011/shout-out-to-arby-s?xrs=share_copy


     
    Last edited: Nov 11, 2013
  19. Udarnik

    Udarnik Gold Meritorious Patron

    Back in the 80s Arbys was half decent, especially on a student stipend. The roast beef was better quality meat than the pink slime that goes into a fast food burger. Then some MBA who called their food a "product" instead of "sandwiches" took over and tanked the quality. I was forced to eat there on a long road trip 2 years ago. First time since grad school.

    It sucked.

    Hard.
     
  20. aegerprimo

    aegerprimo Summa Cum Laude

    I want a Xenu plush toy!:happydance: