VMs in Puerto Rico: This Says It All

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    VMs in Puerto Rico: This Says It All

    This tells you all you need to know about the largest and most effective private relief force on earth Hurricane Maria did not devastate an outer islands of the Philippines or a remote area of Guatemala. This is a US Territory that houses a soon to be “ideal” Scientology org. I take nothing away from […]

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    TRANSLATION: VMs Working With National Guard: Pursuant to COB's urgent telex that all outsourced manpower in the Philippines should immediately redirect all their efforts to handling a major Hill 10 with "The World's Most Dedicated Scientologist", the Maniacal Messianic Moviestar Tom Cruise. The major flap occurred during a recent movie stunt where Mr. Cruised crashed into the side of a skyscraper he was attempting to leap on top of, breaking his ankle (due to SP saboteurs who were attempting to create black PR for Scientology in order to prevent all beings from attaining spiritual freedom, on this planet). During the tumultuous counter-intention incident (it was not a PTS incident!) Mr. Cruise lost his custom made eucalyptus Mont Blanc pen that matched the bespoke paneling in the pimped-out luxury SUV gifted to him by planetary co-savior David Miscavige. After rejecting hundreds of samples of eucalyptus samples because they were not "perfect duplicates", COB order VMs to go to the Philippine jungles in search of the IDEAL WOOD to replace Mr. Cruise's pen. Pictured (above) are VM's ordering hurricane rescue workers to stop working for 3 days while they cut down suitable trees in time to be sampled and sent uplines to COB in the overnight courier package. When the National Guard troops were later questioned why they would allow hurricane victims to die while they followed orders of Scientologists to work on the urgent pen project, they said: "Well, they were really screaming and furiously writing on clipboards and threatening everyone with something about "eternity"--so we kind of thought they might be really dangerous escaped mental patients or something, so we just went along with it until a platoon of heavily armed Navy Seals came and got us out of there and safely away from those psychotic freaks!"

    READER'S NOTE: Yes there really was a custom eucalyptus pen!




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