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Featured From OTVII comp to Ex-Scientologist in under one year .

Discussion in 'Stories From Inside Scientology' started by Mrs Pattycake, Dec 21, 2008.

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  1. The Clam

    The Clam Patron with Honors

    How many quarts of milk can you get from a dead cow? DM would probably know the answer to this question. The way the church is run is bloody a fraud.
    They continue to think up ways to milk " the elite" by reprinting books, changing auditing line ups, bogus causes,and new sp's found except the one in the mirror. I realized the sham in the 90s when asked by a EO who I was pts to.And my reply was the COS to which I was declared. which was cool because most of my friends where non scn and the most of the scn I knew where out to lunch
  2. Axiom142

    Axiom142 Gold Meritorious Patron

    Thanks for telling your story Mrs Pattycake. I’m very sorry to hear about your daughter, this sort of thing is not meant to happen to children of OTs.

    I find your account of being on OTVII fascinating and horrific. To think that I focussed my whole life into getting to this level. :no: I’m glad I didn’t make it anywhere near that far – the disappointment would have been too much.

  3. Cat's Squirrel

    Cat's Squirrel Gold Meritorious Patron

    Yeah, excellent post which pretty much sums up the CofS.
  4. FoTi

    FoTi Crusader

    :thankyou: for sharing your story so far. :gimmesome: more :begging:

    :drama: Can't wait to read the rest of your story. :drama:
  5. Good twin

    Good twin Floater

    Thank you Mrs Patty Cake. It must be difficult to document this. I can see that you experienced many many very major changes in your core viewpoint and belief system in an extremely short period of time.

    It occurred to me that often our greatest gift is also a sort of curse. It's the double edged sword thing. I know you've been out for a while now and once you are out the things we experienced and felt and believed seem long ago and far away. But seeing you going back to the time before you woke up makes me feel compelled to welcome you again.

    Welcome Mrs Patty Cake to life outside the cult paper bag. Here you can live and dream and think and wish. You can love your family unconditionally. You are permitted inconsistencies and vulnerability. You are perfect in your imperfection. We love your exy self!!!

    Good Twin
  6. Roland ami

    Roland ami Patron with Honors

    Changes in OTVII

    Very interesting, adn thanks a lot for posting.

    Can you remember what the changes in auditing were on the level, when GAT came in? I left just before GAT, fortunately.

  7. Mrs Pattycake

    Mrs Pattycake Patron with Honors

    thanks for the comments

    Thanks everyone for your comments and encouragements -Yes I have been out a little while now ( since May this year ) and I did think I was sufficiently over it that I did not need to tell my story.

    But a few weeks ago I hit a low - as a result I decided I needed to confront my experiences in Scientology and sort it out a bit - so I am in the process of doing that.

    Writing up the years on solo nots and spotting all the insanities and outpoints as well as the wins is very therapeutic .

    The good news is that I am out of the low and pretty much back to my usual Pollyanna self !:happydance:
  8. Good twin

    Good twin Floater

    Glad to hear.......:smoochy:

  9. Mrs Pattycake

    Mrs Pattycake Patron with Honors

    next bit

    Oh before I leave the FPRD sec check days I'll give an example of what went wrong for me on this.

    I had finished my sec check, ethics and checksheets and I was now auditing on base – I had a couple of sessions to do and I was out of there. When auditing on base you have to get an exam after every session. I went to exams and red tagged ( No FN at exams ) for the first time ever. A red tag in solo session meant a trip to Qual and the dreaded “look in” session. :no:

    In these days they did not have the fancy electronic set up that they now have where they can view you and your worksheets on a remote TV whilst a remote E-meter in front of the TV duplicates what your meter is actually doing in session. No in these days you went into session with a person from Qual. I think these staff specialised in remaining a little aloof – they were never real friendly.

    So here you were locked in a room doing something that you had been doing for years and had it drilled within an inch of your life that you did this thing totally alone, totally secure from the outside world – it was a very odd feeling to now have someone in the room with you – sort of like someone watching over your shoulder whilst you went to the toilet, or had sex – not very pleasant ! No public liked it. And if you flubbed you had to do it over and over until you did it right !:nervous:

    Anyway I did the solo session and went to exams – I again red tagged ! There was a small error in my session so I did a quick cram and then as per usual I had to have another look in. I did that then off to exams – I red tagged again !!! My folder disappeared and I went to my room. That night I did not sleep well – I felt like I had electric shocks running up and down my spine – I was in terror. I went to see my D of P – I needed to get myself into session fast – something was horribly wrong – they needed to give me my folder so I could solo and fix it and they had to do it NOW !!!

    I had a lovely D of P at that stage and she told me that my folders had gone to be FESed. I couldn't wait I had to handle this NOW – I was in tears. She looked at me calmly and said ' Vicky you're a really good solo auditor – don't you think its odd that you've never red tagged before and now you red tagged 3 times in a row ? Just wait ...the FES will handle it”.

    Although she hadn't said it I read between the lines and totally got her comm – the problem was not my fuck up but the FPRD sec check – I knew immediately that a chain was unflat – and that seemed to calm me right down. I was able to wait for my folder and sure enough I went for a review session ( at my expense of course ) to fix the unflat FPRD chain. That done I then was allowed back on solo where I breezed through the solo and routed out the next day.

    I mention this here now because this unflat FPRD had such a bad effect on me and that was only in the space of a few days – you will read later how this gross out tech nearly ruined our lives. :omg:
  10. Mrs Pattycake

    Mrs Pattycake Patron with Honors

    Each trip to Flag there was a “new flavour of the month”.:confused2: One of the most dangerous ones was what we termed the FN evolution ! We had all been drilled on spotting FN's and no matter what drills you had on your non confidential checksheet everyone had to re do the FN spotting drill – just to keep you perfect on it ! Well on one trip to Flag I was flunked for calling what looked to me like FN's – I was getting rather upset – that was what I had been doing in session for the past so many years and now I was being told I was WRONG !!! Boy does that shake your stable datums and wrap your case around your head in no time flat ! You suddenly get the idea that you have been leaving cycles unflat all over the place !!!:bigcry:

    Well it did not take long to realise that lots of other students were having the same problem. And it did not stop there. It seemed even the auditors and examiners were having this problem. There were red tags everywhere – one poor guy was on his 13th look in !!!
    You had to have an absolutely perfect FN to call it – 3 sweeps , all even in size and speed – just like the mechanical simulator . Spotting one of these was like finding a needle in a haystack – producing one was even harder !!! I took to “sharing my win” with the examiner to assist in the perfect FN , I also had a favourite examiner – the combination seemed to work.:thumbsup:

    Low and behold the next refresher – on the same drill I was getting flunked for missing FN's. WHAT ??? I was thoroughly corrected last time – nope – it seems that now you needed 3 sweeps, but now the speed had only to be approximately the same, and the sweep was allowed to widen but not narrow . Crikey ! Another bunch of sessions invalidated !!!:angry:

    By this time I had begun to realise that Flag was not infallible. I also was not as in awe of the other more trained auditors. It seemed that being trained only on the solo material was kind of an advantage – I knew nothing else – so couldn't get myself into too much of a pickle by applying something else. For example – I twinned with a highly trained solo auditor who was also a CS in a local org. She had flubbed on the Int handling. I was thinking – how did she manage that – its pretty basic – she explained that she had confused the regular Int handling for pcs with the solo version. After that I never worried about my level of competency. :yes:
    Last edited: Dec 22, 2008
  11. Vinaire

    Vinaire Sponsor

    Scientology is Scientology. LRH is LRH. But each individual have their own interpretation of Scientology and LRH. None of it is wrong or right. It just is.

    What is wrong, however, is to undermine your own observation to someone else's interpretation... including the interpretations by LRH himself.

    Self-determined knowledge is senior to everything that flows to you. You are now recognizing that... and that is wonderful to watch.

    You are showing courage.

    Last edited: Dec 22, 2008
  12. Been Done Had

    Been Done Had Patron with Honors

    Thank you!

    I am really enjoying these posts. I love hearing the details of how the tech does work. The church destroys its own credibility by insisting everything is perfect in its promo, to that when you spot an outness it becomes a missed w/h.
  13. FoTi

    FoTi Crusader

    Thank you

    Mrs Pattycake, thank you so much for sharing your story - it's really helpful to read other people's stories here. Everyone who shares their story helps to fill in a piece of the puzzle.

    After reading yours, so far, I don't understand how there are any people left on the upper levels at Flag.

    Have you seen Greg and Debra Barnes video, on OCMB, regarding the Sec Checks on the upper levels?
  14. Div6

    Div6 Crusader

    Out Tech? At Flag? The "Mecca of Perfection"?

    Next you will be telling me that Class XII's use the water closet!

    Why hasn't this heretic been burned with the rest of them? :D :D :D

    Please, continue. The TA is moving.....:coolwink:
  15. degraded being

    degraded being Sponsor

    At the Mecca of Technical Perfection
    they use "the water closet".

    At AO ANZO the just use the dunny.
  16. Panda Termint

    Panda Termint Cabal Of One

    Write on, Mrs P, your audience awaits... :)
  17. Tim Skog

    Tim Skog Silver Meritorious Patron

    :goodposting: Ms Pattycake. :drama:
  18. FoTi

    FoTi Crusader

    What is a dunny?
  19. FoTi

    FoTi Crusader

    Looking forward to more of your story, Mrs Pattycake.

    :drama: :drama: :drama: :drama:
  20. Telepathetic

    Telepathetic Gold Meritorious Patron

    Excellent story,please continue:yes: