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This guy claims to be LRH

Discussion in 'L Ron Hubbard' started by Spirit, Feb 17, 2018.

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  1. Spirit

    Spirit just another son of God

    When I heard about this, I had to stop by and share it here on ESMB. :cool:
    Admin: Please pardon the error if it is already shared or please remove it.
    Last edited: Feb 18, 2018
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  2. DagwoodGum

    DagwoodGum Squirreling Dervish

    Just thinking, wouldn't it be a trip if someone who had known everything about Ron as an insider would, trained someone who would hypothetically be the right age that Ron would be if he did come back?
    Trained him to know all the right answers, and yet be charismatic enough to pull off convincing the right people that he was, in fact, Ron?
    He would then take over the reigns of Scientology, as how could his elf stand, though only up to his waist, in his or her way?
    Then after slowly looting it he could announce he had it all wrong and was starting from scratch with his new religion Scienetics and leave the cult in a pile of twisted wreckage reminiscent of 911.
    Or even if someone made a movie of that so we could all "line charge" over it!!!
    Last edited: Feb 18, 2018
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  3. NoIdea

    NoIdea Patron with Honors

    That is hilarious.
  4. pineapple

    pineapple Silver Meritorious Patron

    Has vast possibilities ... How about if the fake Ron was hypnotized to believe that he really was Ron, and was implanted with all the correct data, mannerisms, etc., so that the disguise was almost flawless ...

    And then after looting the cult (not inconsistent at all, since scn was after all really only a vehicle for LRH's personal enrichment and glorification), he declares that Earth is hopeless, the wogs here are beyond redemption, and constructs a giant spaceship to take all his followers to Target II, where they'll have greater success, he assures them ...

    Miscavige, who has somehow leaned the truth, runs to the spaceship at the last moment, as the last dial-wide-F/N'ing scio is boarding and the hatch is closing, and screams desperately, "Don't go! It's all a con!" but his puny voice is drowned out by the roar of the engines firing, which incinerate him ...

    The ship gains altitude, but when it gets a couple hundred miles above the earth it explodes in a massive fireball ...
  5. pineapple

    pineapple Silver Meritorious Patron

    continued ...

    Turns out the fake Ron wasn't on the spaceship himself. Being such a high-powered super-OT, he was going to teleport to Target II and join his followers there later ...

    When he sees the ship explode in a massive fireball it snaps him out of his hypnotic state.

    "Wait ...," he says, "I'm not really L. Ron Hubbard at all. I just thought I was. But ... who am I?"

    He stands there a few seconds in contemplation, then shrugs his shoulders and says, "Well, maybe I don't know who I am, but at least now I know who I am not, and am ready to find out who I really am."

    He turns and walks away into the sunset (beautifully enhanced by the spaceship explosion) as the ending credit roll ... For music, maybe this ...

    Last edited: Feb 18, 2018
  6. programmer_guy

    programmer_guy True Ex-Scientologist

    Last edited: Feb 18, 2018
  7. TheSneakster

    TheSneakster More Skeptical Than You

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  8. Teanntás

    Teanntás Silver Meritorious Patron

    "Why anyone is complaining is also beyond me. I would beseech anyone to do a search on Google about how may travesties have occurred historically, and how may individuals have died, as a result of the Christian Crusades and Torquemada - a man that caused so many atrocities in the name of the Roman Catholic Church, that the modern word "torture' is literally named after the man. So just how many have died as a result of Islam or Christianity, it is in the MILLIONS folks, the Millions.

    "Queen Isabella’s secretary, wrote that 2,000 executions took place throughout the entirety of her reign, which extended well beyond Torquemada's death"ás_de_Torquemada

    He's also got the etymology of the word 'torture' wrong . Maybe he is LRH :D
    Last edited: Feb 18, 2018
  9. Wilbur

    Wilbur Patron Meritorious

    Well, whoever it is didn't bother with a college education: the website has a fair number of minor grammatical and spelling errors, butcher's apostrophe ("it's" instead of "its") etc. Which is a sign of the times, I suppose. I'm surprised there aren't more people born after 1986 coming up with LRH as their former life in the freezone. I wonder whether you'd be declared if you came up with that as a churchie.

    tesseract likes this.
  10. Wilbur

    Wilbur Patron Meritorious

    One of the comments on his blog is hilarious:

    "Hey Ron, how come you were so afraid of going to the dentist? Didn't you get your best material from going to the dentist?"

  11. FoTi

    FoTi Crusader

    This is B.S.
  12. Teanntás

    Teanntás Silver Meritorious Patron
  13. DagwoodGum

    DagwoodGum Squirreling Dervish

    Heeeerrr's Ronny;

    Who I Am
    I am the reincarnated being formerly known as L Ron Hubbard. This lifetime I am working towards unifying the subject of Dianetics and Scientology while streamlining it for mainstream use with lightning fast results. Also, I'm striving towards reconciliation between disgruntled and excommunicated ex-members and the official church of Scientology.
    Favorite interests are anything technology related and science fiction. I am also a sucker for beautiful redheads or women by the name of Mary. You can Google the rest.
    Enough to give you a case of the Ronnnzzz
    Last edited: Feb 18, 2018
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  14. pineapple

    pineapple Silver Meritorious Patron

    Maybe we could have Miscavige being behind the fake Ron in the first place. He has the guy implanted to think and act like LRH in hopes of bolstering the failing cult. He crows, "Look, here he is, back from the dead! Source! Total validation!" It doesn't work though, because so much has come out about LRH's lies about virtually everything he ever did that people don't want scn even if Ron has come back to run it ...

    Christian religious leaders denounce "Ron II" as an abomination. Some call him the Antichrist. Ron II responds to this accusation with a mysterious but evil-sounding laugh ...

    As time goes on the fake Ron becomes less manageable and finally decides he wants to run the show himself. He busts DM down to washroom attendant and takes over the reins. He sells off the cult's mostly empty orgs to build the giant spaceship. Scientists predict the thing will never make it out of earth orbit, but "Ron" assures his followers that once they get out of the atmosphere they'll switch to "hyperdrive" using their merged OT powers. Since this is coming from Source, they buy it. "Wow, that really indicates!" they say blissfully ...
    Last edited: Feb 18, 2018
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  15. pineapple

    pineapple Silver Meritorious Patron

    How does he feel about women named Sara?
  16. DagwoodGum

    DagwoodGum Squirreling Dervish

    I am also a sucker for beautiful redheads or women by the name of Mary.
    How does he feel about women named Sara?

    Or is it cryptic for announcing his bi-sexuality? Sucker for red heads? Perhaps of the 6" + variety? Then women named Mary, don't some gays refer to each other as Mary's? Perhaps we'll never know, nor want to.
    Or maybe the spaceship will be open only to members of the gay community perhaps?
    Leaving those few of us left of the hetero persuasion to wallow here on earth for our eternity?
  17. F.Bullbait

    F.Bullbait Oh, a wise guy,eh?

    1- the guy wears glasses.

    2- he has what looks like the Tripadvisor owl tattooed on his forehead, not exactly the mark of the beast.

    3- aren't there enough duplicated Rons around as it is?
    tesseract likes this.
  18. George Layton

    George Layton Silver Meritorious Patron

  19. uncover

    uncover Gold Meritorious Patron

    What else ?
    Or do you believe that El Con Hubbard could have the balls to visit this planet again ? :cool:

    Think about all those angry OT VIII who are stuck on their bridge....
    Last edited: Feb 18, 2018
  20. ILove2Lurk

    ILove2Lurk Lisbeth Salander

    . . .
    Caveat: I no longer believe in the Hubbard doctrines.
    If one were to believe in the Hubbard doctrines bottom to top,
    then the following would make an interesting discussion:

    Theoretically, this guy could be the returned "center" being Hubbard.

    Theoretically, he could be any one of the thousands of "entities" Ron
    blew off, each of which would share some of his memories and,
    consequently, have equal claims on the Hubbard PC folders.

    It's a surprise that a whole slew of them haven't returned to make
    claims on the folders and continue up "their individual bridges."

    This absence of "returnees" alone punches a pretty big hole in the
    whole Hubbard theory. Like others on the message board, I believed
    at one time. Decades ago, the lack of returnees and their claims on
    PC folders did it for me. I had asked many upper level tech people at
    Flag about this (Class 12s and such) and no one seemed to have any
    clue or answers. I left. I've been gone for a couple decades.

    What do I think about this new LRH guy? Troll.

    Everyone knows LRH is returning as a politician. (Wink, wink.)

    "I will return not as a religious leader but a political one. That
    happens to be the requisite beingness for the task at hand."

    ;) ;) ;)
    Last edited: Feb 18, 2018
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