My Story

Discussion in 'Great Web Sites and Links' started by PokerPlayer, May 18, 2018.

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  1. PokerPlayer

    PokerPlayer Patron

    I am putting my story out there in website format: smokinram.com

    Took me a long time to decide to do this but I am doing it.
    It's also going to take me a very long time to finish it. But it will be done.
    It's just getting started. Maybe you will want to read it and give me emotional support along the way.

    Thank you,

    Danny
     
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  2. Gib

    Gib Crusader

    Cool, Shake it off. I'm all ears.

     
    Last edited: May 18, 2018
  3. exbritscino

    exbritscino Patron with Honors

    Hi Danny.

    Glad to see that you're now out of the cult lunatic asylum!!

    Great start to your website. I've bookmarked it and am looking forward to reading more as you add to it.

    I've read just about every book exposing scientology for what it really is, and am a regular on the former members' websites, such as this one, although I don't post that often.

    I really didn't start learning about the REAL side to scientology for about 4 years after I got out.......... Then one day I bought my first computer and discovered the internet........... Up to this point I honestly thought that all the abuses of people, and financial crimes committed, were confined to the out ethics mission that I had the misfortune to belong to. How wrong was I................

    I always love reading stuff written by exes. New stories shouldn't actually surprise me by now, but they always do.

    Your bit about the OT's on your site made me chuckle. This really does show that "OT" is something people have been indoctrinated into believing. OT's still screw up, they still get old, they still eventually die, they still have accidents, they still contract illnesses and diseases, they still "justify" having "out 2D's". They are actually HUMAN!!!!!

    The best part of it is that if a spokesperson for the cult was to be questioned about all the examples that you gave, they would NEVER say that scientology doesn't work, or that some aspect of it was at fault. It's always the fault of someone else, usually the person who has fallen foul of their "policies".

    Your bit about KSW was very real to me as well. When I first joined staff I did the Staff Status courses, among plenty of others, and had my "wow factor" kick in. Hubbard made things sound so simplistic and real in the Staff Status', so I looked forward to applying the "tech".

    Trying to ACTUALLY apply it in the nuthouse that passed as a mission was another thing entirely!!! There was always some flap or another, yet another "all hands" urgent job, yet another reason to pull people off post, etc....... It was always down to some "exec" who had sufficient rank to completely bypass policy altogether........ Dunno why we bothered with the Staff Status courses as no one could actually apply them!!!

    Same with KSW. You'll always find someone who has a valid "reason" to ignore it and therefore, in Hubbard's own words, commit High Crimes and Suppressive Acts. Apart from the fact that, in my opinion, scientology has very little benefit to the vast majority of people, the hierarchy who should be applying it simply don't. Especially when it suits their own vested interests not to..........

    Anyway, that's enough rambling from me. Keep writing and I'll keep reading.

    Well done on creating your site.
     
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  4. PokerPlayer

    PokerPlayer Patron

    Thank you Exbritsino!

    yes, there seems to always be a reason outside of the tech didn't work for a reason that the tech didn't work.

    I have experienced everything you said in your response to me: the all hands, some reason to pull someone off post, some something or another that would make it nearly ipoosible to follow the policy of Hubbard. however, when I look back it now, that seems to be the policy, everything always to be an emergency and must be done NOW!

    yes, OT's are human that is probably some of it and it's probably some of my own case that gets kicked in those examples: that was one of the reasons I joined Scientology in the first place (not the only): all the out 2D that goes on in the world. I will get to writing all that up, it will be hard but I will get there and do it.

    Thanks so much for reading. I promise I won't stop. it's all going to come out. It's not nearly as bad as many stories out there but, one thing for sure, it's MY OWN STORY.

    Danny
     
  5. Clay Pigeon

    Clay Pigeon Silver Meritorious Patron

    No person who likes this video may justifiably accuse Hubbard of sexual perversion
     
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  6. Gib

    Gib Crusader

    I was more looking at it from beat of the song and lyrics.

    Your argument is not right.

    Statue of Michael Angelo from ancient times, freely found on the internet and anybody who visits Italy

    You Americans? LOL

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_(Michelangelo)
     
  7. AnonyMary

    AnonyMary Formerly Fooled - Finally Free

    Welcome, Danny. I am enjoying what you wrote in
    "Keeping Scientology Working #1 Keeping Scientology Working Series 1"

    KSW and Study Tech and key indoctrination methods. As a fellow former scientologist course supervisor, although not at an upper org, I really appreciate all that you put the time into explaining all this.

    Over the years, I have written several shorter statements on this forum about my observations, experiences, and guilt as a 'chief' indoctrinator for Scientology via my job as a course sup, but my time as a course sup was minor. Maybe 1.5 years total, temporarily filling in for sups at different orgs across the US over a 3 year span of time. But I was a diehard KSW'er for all my years. I lived and breathed KSW. I also bropught many many people intoi Scientology, sold thousands of DMSMH... but as a sup,what a blind fool I was. And worse for insisting on the use of standard study tech. But you understand. You get it.

    It was only after I'd finally gotten onto the internet, and read and read and read all that I could find ( see: "Internet Resources on Scientology for newcomers" sticky thread in New Member Introductions ), that I began to get this understanding of the magnitude of what I was doing, then the guilt; and to feel this powerful sense of former purpose (which meant so much to me) shatter.

    It took time to really look at what my intent really was. In the end, I saw that I just wanted to help. And my desire to help was misdirected, and channeled into something else. You are doing the right thing by writing on your blog. It's on the internet, searchable in Google search results (unlike all that gets posted on Facebook). Exes and potential exes, coming to the internet and searching about Scientology, will be able to find your writings. Just remember to use key words, what they call tag words, at the bottom of each article, so people searching those words will be able to easily find the article.

    I am rarely here these days due to a busy schedule, so if you reply, it may be a while for me to respond. But I love what you are doing. Becoming Free From Scientology
     
  8. dchoiceisalwaysrs

    dchoiceisalwaysrs Gold Meritorious Patron

    Hi Pokerplayer

    Keep shooting it straight at us. I always learn something from these stories even though I was in 37 years.
     
  9. PokerPlayer

    PokerPlayer Patron

    I'm not sure what I could share that someone that was in for 37 years doesn't already know, but I appreciate it.

    i also appreciate all the encouragement from this forum brings.

    This forum REALLY help me vent when i left Scientology. You may have noticed my first few blog post were word for word what i have posted here back 2009.

    2009? damn.. this shit sticks with you.

    Hardest thing I have found is finding someone that actually GETS when you are saying when you speak of Scientology. People just don't get it. Some don't even want to and turn a deaf ear. Some just don't have the comprehension ability to get it.

    I'm going to do what i can to get people to understand this subject and STAY away from it

    thanks again.
     
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  10. hummingbird

    hummingbird Patron with Honors

    @PokerPlayer, I read your list of bad outcomes on your blog. Wow. I too know of OTs who have died young (heart attack and cancer). And here I am, a declared SP still puttering along in my 60s.

    This is a long way of saying: Welcome!!!

    :welcome2:

    Thanks for the blog, am looking forward to more. And, you will come out of the $cn fog eventually. It just takes time. I've found being here helps immensely.
     
  11. PokerPlayer

    PokerPlayer Patron

  12. exbritscino

    exbritscino Patron with Honors

    Hi Danny.

    I've been reading your blog, and congratulations. It's great. Very well written and a real eye opener. Just when I thought that I'd seen all the eye openers from various people.........

    You'll be amazed at what people don't know about a lot of scientology. Even if they've been in for 37 years. I admit that I was lucky enough to only be in it for 4 and a half years, and even then only at Mission level. However, when I got out it took me a further 3 and a half years to look on the internet and learn all about the REAL side of scientology.

    I liken it to being at a game of football (soccer here in the UK). When you're at the match then you are actually THERE, watching it live. But you'll be amazed at what you don't see, or misinterpret, or a refereeing decision is made which you think is wrong etc...... It's only when you get home and watch the highlights of the match on TV that you realise what you DIDN'T actually see despite it happening in front of you.

    The above example is, in my opinion, similar to being in the bubble, (at the match), then getting out of the bubble and seeing what REALLY happened, (back at home watching it on TV).

    I fully agree with you in trying to get someone to fully understand what you say when you speak about scientology. Other ex's is no problem, but to get people to understand who have never been in it is another thing altogether. The usual response is "If it's that bad why didn't you just walk?" As we ex's know, it ain't that easy............

    I really miss having people to talk to about scientology face to face. Mainly because the ex's that I did know have moved elsewhere now, and I find it a struggle talking to people who were never in..........

    Keep writing. People are reading!

    Take care.
     
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  13. Gib

    Gib Crusader

  14. dchoiceisalwaysrs

    dchoiceisalwaysrs Gold Meritorious Patron

    Oh, there is a lot....tonnes that I didn't know. Yesterday I just finished reading "Escaping Scientology" by Karen Schless Pressley a tremendous insight into scientology managment and David Miscavige. And a couple of weeks ago I read Chris Shugart's book "Fractured Journey" which amongst a lot more lays out the financial extortion that is demanded by the Cult's battle plans and policies and they both revealed a tremendous amount of insanity about the CULTure of scientology that I had never heard of while a member.
     

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