I am done

[Lori]

Thanks guys I too have gotten "lazy" but it sur feels good to not have to have any deadlines or targets! Gotta go out and find a job but should not have too much problem doing that. Am far away from any "friends from the Org" who might drop by and try and "handle" me. Have been contacted to go in and route off though but will not do it. I saw first hand what happens when it comes time to resign contract the pressure and intimidation. Can only imagine the incredible pressure if they got me in to "route off properly" they would literally try to and all to make themselves right.

Lots of love and hugs to you all and will be reading and absorbing more and more information. I have just been given a book called Holywood, Satanism, Scientology by Jerry Staton from a close childhood friend. I haven't started reading it yet. Does anyone here know much about it. She said she got it when she found out that I was in Scientology and was waiting for me to "come to my senses" to give it to me. I told her last week like I felt my soul had been raped and she said this book will explain why i felt that way.

 

[Blue Spirit]

The Two-Faced Ron

42yearsin&pissed Wrote:
"lrh wrote "what is greatness," but was living his life as one of the most vengeful human beings on the planet! but i read it and thought "what a great man lrh is."

It does seem that LRH was skilled at playing the good guy/ bad guy sides
of all of his games.



42yearsin&pissed Wrote:
"you can write anything. and lrh did. that's what he did. and who doesn't love to talk? why, those briefing course tapes just go on and on. and the congresses, etc. he had a ball. who wouldn't? "


There's a reference from Ron, that says one who talks alot has a lot of
overts. I guess he would know !

 

[Mark A. Baker]

There's a reference from Ron, that says one who talks alot has a lot of overts. I guess he would know !

I'm often struck when listening to the lectures how frequently his side or illustrative comments about other people's "out-ethics" actually quite closely mirror his own. It's almost as though he was signaling his "missed withholds" for all to hear and miss.

Personally I doubt it was intentional "gamesmanship" on his part. I suspect he just couldn't restrain himself when presented with an audience. It had the result of him repeatedly bringing up overts similar to his own as "negative examples".


Mark A. Baker

 

[Cherished]

Thanks guys I too have gotten "lazy" but it sur feels good to not have to have any deadlines or targets!

It's good to hear you're doing okay, Lori. That's all I wanted to know. So, feel free to be as "lazy" as you like about posting here. There's no pressure. When you need us, we'll be here.

 

[SweetnessandLight]

Big hugs to everybody on this thread!

 

[nyunknown]

Hi 42! Wow 42 years! I cannot imagine! Sounds like you could write a book about your experiences. I know david M. and the rest of those looneys would try to ban and supress any anti-scientology books. Love to here more of you story.

 

[gaiagnostic]

spiritually attacked

Hi Lori, Welcome. I am out one year now. On feeling as if your soul has been raped, there is truth there. I felt as if I had been spiritually attacked. My advice is read, read, read. Understand what mind control is. Knowledge is power.

 

[Chess]

Hi,

I was in Scientology for 42 years. Off OT7 now and out. Way out.

I am DONE.

Welcome and well done.
There are some very helpful and understanding people here.
Don't give yourself a hard a time for not knowing, it's mind control cult - that's their trade. Your true chance at some peace and freedom are now possible .
Best of luck

 

[Not Anonymous]

Interesting... made me think.

Welcome 42, me, a 30 year in youngster also was on 7.

And a note concerning the aussie vs american vernacular, when I stopped auditing on 7 and went and had my first beer for 8 years... well it only took one to be pissed, (a little) so there he could still be an aussie...

And a story for you:


http://minueting.weebly.com


Cheers
Min

Your comment about your first beer for 7 years made me reel a bit...

I still feel a pang of guilt when I have a drink... I also get tipsy quickly... no tolerance I suppose! Still not sure if it's a good thing or not...

Well, all things considered, I think it is. I do enjoy a nice glass of red wine... NA

 

[Voltaire's Child]

Yeah, can't have alcohol if you have course scheduled within 24 hours...even if there's no auditing taking place. Really plays havoc w/ one's drinking schedule.

I'm not being sarcastic. It's just that I often thought "What's the harm in ONE drink?"

 

[humphrey]

I have been lurking in the background, reading posts, PMing to a few,and trying to get up the nerve to "escape" from what I now refer as The Cult of Scientology for the last several months.

Two weeks ago I finally made the cut. It was the hardest thing I ever did in my life, leaving behind someone I love with my whole heart but I had to for ME.

I was slowly dying inside but stubborn enough to fight. It is amazing now that I am out, and clearer headed, that the very thing they tried to suppress and invalidate in me, (my self determinism) was the very thing that gave me the final strength to walk away from scientology (i will not dignify it with capital letters). I was labeled as having a "problem with authority"

Before tonight I did not have the nerve to write too much publicly preferring to only PMing those I trusted like Tory, whom I credit and thank from the bottom of my heart with giving me the strength and encouragement I needed to finally make that final step.

After so many years both as public and staff, and hundreds of thousands of dollars thrown down the toilet, I am now publicly announcing that I am out and if they think they can bully me then they ain't really met me yet on my own turf. And, here is what i do when they call and leave me a message, or text me to "come in and route off properly

This is to those brave (and sometimes weird) souls that are out almost every weekend and some week days in front of the Orgs. Keep it up. It may not seem like it but you are being heard.

The infrastructure is collapsing, courseroom attendance is plummeting, and the Orgs are desperately trying to get in "fresh meat" pushing staff members harder and harder to get people in. The public scientologists are getting fed up with being regged every weekend and a large majority will not answer their phones. Panic is setting in and it is only a matter of time before more and more turn their backs and close their pocketbooks.

As the pressure to go Ideal increases so does the desperation for staff members, that is one reason the Missions and City Offices are closing. They are being absorbed by the Orgs they are attached to, in order to fill the staff quotas! This I know for a fact.

So, I predict as the CofS plummets down that dwindling spiral they have created we will be hearing from more and more people on this forum.

I am honored to be a member and now know for a certainty that I Am Not Alone any longer.

Is this real?

I'm glad you left.

Did they ever ask you stalk anyone

 

[Lohan2008]

Welcome

Lori as well

The infrastructure is collapsing, courseroom attendance is plummeting, and the Orgs are desperately trying to get in "fresh meat" pushing staff members harder and harder to get people in. The public scientologists are getting fed up with being regged every weekend and a large majority will not answer their phones. Panic is setting in and it is only a matter of time before more and more turn their backs and close their pocketbooks.

 

[degraded being]

Recommended reading to people who leave the cult of scientology:

Bare faced Messiah: by Russell Miller.
L. Ron Hubbard. Messiah or madman: by Bent Corydon.

Both of these books give a very thorough look into scientology. All those "outnesses" you noticed, and things you wondered about like what must be going on "uplines" etc., well you will be able to connect the dots. Both may be available as downloads on the net.

 

[SweetnessandLight]

Welcome Humphrey!

 

[I told you I was trouble]

Lori (and all new posters) ...

Hello and welcome (I only just found your posts Lori) ...

 

[Mockingbird6]

Why don't we help Lori out?

Why don't we help Lori and anyone like her out, by helping her "end cycle" by making up our own routing out form? I can imagine this could get pretty rowdy but we could sort out some sensible questions that would actually help any SO or staff member end cycle to their own satisfaction, rather than OSA's. Any suggestions?
M6

 

[anonomog]

Why don't we help Lori and anyone like her out, by helping her "end cycle" by making up our own routing out form? I can imagine this could get pretty rowdy but we could sort out some sensible questions that would actually help any SO or staff member end cycle to their own satisfaction, rather than OSA's. Any suggestions?
M6

doesn't "end cycle" mean "dropping the body"?
Not sure if Lori would appreciate that.
A confused anon wog.

 

[totallyblown:)]

Great stuff!

Congratulations you must feel great.
I have been out for a year now and feel better and better and CLEARER AND CLEARER as time goes on.
The director of CRASH has just left after 35 years, the French gov. have sued and yes, as a previous UK staff member and supervisor, I can say that it IS crumbling.
They still have enough money to put on a good show, the yearly BBQ and ram roast at St Hill but the coffers will soon dwindle.
I am so happy now I have left all that prejudice and regging behind.

Sending you all the best and welcome to your life of FREEDOM.
LOVE
XXX

 

[FinallyFree]

thank you, all, from the bottom of my heart. i do indeed feel very welcome.

i'd love to tell you my "story," which is really not all that interesting, especially when compared with some of yours, particularly while you were on staff and in the s.o. all i can say is it's very different and "imaginative."

but i am VERY recently out and things seem to change daily but are beginning to settle down. an LRH quote does not immediately put me into a rage; now a few seconds elapse. know what I mean?

however, just another pissed-off area of mine is lack of free speech. was particularly bothered by this while in scientology and still am constrained when out because of concern regarding a couple of family members. when these situations settle out, i won't give a damn about any anonymity or what happened.

thanks for your encouragement.

42

Oh Pissed – you are soooooo not being fair to yourself! You have excellent stories!!!! I had such a great time with you and yours Sat. I am so glad we have all re-connected!!!!

I love knowing people here. I am hoping my sister will soon join us!!!

People 42yearsin&pissed is one of the sweetest, wonderful people I have had the pleasure of reconnecting with!

(I am just going to called you Pissed from now on! It fits!!!!)

 

[Mark A. Baker]

doesn't "end cycle" mean "dropping the body"?

No. It means to terminate through completion what ever action or program is current. Finishing the book is ending the cycle of reading. Graduation would be ending the cycle of school. Retirement would be ending the cycle of work. Death, or "dropping the body", would be ending the cycle of life.

It's derived from "Do" in "Be-Do-Have", which is the scientology simplification of the Vedantic metaphysical myth of Brahma-Vishnu-Shiva.

A confused anon wog.

It would help to learn something about the subject of scientology so that you can actually understand what you think you are protesting.


Mark A. Baker